Steal These 4 Scripts to Make a Clear Ask

A lot of us think we’re being clear when making an ask…

But we’re actually not. 😳

And this week?

I had three conversations that proved the point.

Here’s what happened:

#1: A book club leader emailed me.

She started a Wild Courage book club (amazing!) and told me how fun it would be if I joined one of their meetings.

But she didn’t ask.

Instead she wrote, “Wish I had thought to ask you to speak!”

I offered anyway and she was thrilled. But it left me wondering, Why didn’t she just ask?

#2: A friend messaged me about supporting their passion for animals.

She shared the mission. Described what she hoped to do. Attached photos and details and ended with a thank-you.

But I couldn’t figure out what she actually wanted. Did she want funding? Encouragement? Advice?

So I replied, “What is the request of me?”

Even when she wrote back, it still wasn’t direct.

#3: Then I caught myself making the same mistake.

I was wrapping up a keynote pitch. It was a great call—and we were seconds from hanging up.

But I heard my dad’s voice in my head:

Ask for the job.

So I said: “I’d love to do this. I think we’d have so much fun together, and I’d be grateful for the opportunity to partner.”

It felt assertive. But later, I realized…

…I didn’t make the ask.

“Do you think this would be a fit?”​
​“Would you like to work together on this?”​
​“How can I make this an easy yes for your decision-makers?”

I fell into the exact same trap.

The Problem

We think we’re being clear.

We think we’re making the bold ask.

But we’re actually being confusing.

Instead of asking for what we want, we:

– Drop hints
– Make vague statements
– Hope the other person reads between the lines

And then we wonder why nothing happens.

The Big Small Thing

Being indirect feels safer in the moment.

But it creates more work and more confusion in the long run.

If you don’t make the ask, the answer is always no.

Steal These 4 Scripts to Make a Clear Ask:

1. Want feedback from your boss?

Instead of: “Let me know if you have any thoughts.”

Say: “Could I grab 15 minutes Wednesday to get your feedback before I send this Q3 recap to [VP name]? I want to make sure it reflects the team’s impact clearly.”

2. Need to leave the meeting early to catch your kid’s recital?

Instead of: Faking a cough or mysteriously disappearing…

Say: “Quick heads up—I’ll need to hop off the Zoom by 3:50 to make it to Ava’s school play. Happy to follow up async on anything I miss!”

3. Want to be considered for a promotion?

Instead of: “I’d like to get your thoughts on my promotion potential.”

Say: “I’d love to go up for Senior Manager next cycle. Could we talk about what specific outcomes I’d need to deliver this quarter to be in the running?”

4. Want someone to review your resume or portfolio?

Instead of: “Would love any feedback!”

Say: “Would you be open to giving a 5-minute gut check on my resume? I’m applying for [specific role], and I want to make sure it directly highlights my skillset.”

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How This Helps You Get What You Want

Clear asks open doors.

Not always right away. Not always with a yes.

But they build trust.
Show initiative.
And get you one step closer to what you want.

Say what you want out loud.

Make the ask.

And let people surprise you with a yes.