Protect your time: cancel your meeting with confidence using a “Clean Cancel” email

Tracey is my media trainer.

She reviews the podcasts and news interviews I do to make sure I sound awesome.

(And she is awesome. If you need a communications coach or media trainer, email her immediately: tracey@15mingroup.com)

Yesterday, I had a packed day and nothing pressing to cover in our monthly-ish meeting.

I knew I wanted to cancel our meeting.

But I didn’t.

Instead, I spiraled:

What if she prepped?
What if it’s rude to cancel day-of?
Does this make me look unorganized?

What if she skipped coffee with a friend to meet with me?

So. Much. Guilt.

But I wanted the time back.

So I opened my inbox to cancel the meeting…and froze.

I couldn’t pull the trigger.

The Problem

Most of us are bad at canceling.

Not because we don’t know what we want.

But because we feel bad asking for it.

So we tiptoe.
We soften.
We hand off the decision and make it their emotional labor.

It feels polite. But it actually creates…

• Anxiety (because now they have to guess what you want)
• Decision fatigue (are we meeting or not?)
• Unnecessary back-and-forth (which wastes everyone’s time)

The Big Small Thing

There are 3 types of “cancel” emails you can send.

Only 1 of them works. Let me break it down:

❌ DO NOT SEND: The “Delegation” Email

This was my first draft to Tracey. (Before I improved it.)

I call this the “Delegation” Email—because instead of making a decision, you outsource it.

Notice there are five “you” statements, highlighted in red. Which means I’m making her do the work I didn’t want to do.

Why this doesn’t work:

• Puts the emotional and mental load on Tracey
• Feels vague, hesitant, and overly polite
• Makes me look unsure—even though I knew I wanted to cancel

I’m a huge fan of delegating. But a cancellation is not something you should delegate to the other party.

❌ DO NOT SEND: The “Cancel Ping Pong” Email

Here’s what it sounds like when no one wants to decide:

(This didn’t actually happen with Tracey but I start this game of ping pong more often than I should.)

Me: Hey Tracey: How are you feeling today? Still want to meet?

Tracey: I’m good either way! I’m heading to the airport right after our call but could still meet! What’s better for you?

Me: Have you prepped anything? If so, happy to keep. Otherwise, perhaps we regroup next month?

Tracey: I did review some of your podcasts, but those notes aren’t going anywhere! Want to just reschedule?

Me: That works for me, but truly also happy to still hop on. Maybe just for 15 min for quick check-in vs the full hour?

Why this doesn’t work:

• Nobody wants to be the bad guy, so the decision just bounces back and forth
• Wastes time and energy on both sides
• Creates unnecessary overthinking and scheduling chaos
• Makes you look indecisive

Don’t play cancel ping pong. Just make the call.

✅ DO SEND: The “Clean Cancel” Email

Instead of waffling, I rewrote my email to Tracey and sent this:

Why this works:

• I fully own the decision — no emotional outsourcing
• Zero “you” statements, three clear “I” statements
• 23 words vs. 43 = a 46% time savings
• Shorter, sharper, and more respectful of her time
• No ambiguity = no back-and-forth

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How This Helps You Get What You Want

The “Clean Cancel” protects your time, energy, and reputation.

It signals you know what you want, and you’re confident enough to say it.

So next time you need to cancel?

Don’t waffle. Just say so.

The “Clean Cancel” is the new power move.